Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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