Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
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