Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
