if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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