dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
