I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
