as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
