just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I have grass duct taped all over my body
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
