It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
