my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
