I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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