can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
