franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
