I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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