Duck Duck Cougar?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
