if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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