Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
