And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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