North Korea, Best Korea!
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize