Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
