Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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