I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
two words...techno handjob
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
