speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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