a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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