in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
