Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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