like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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