if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
