Grow some girl-balls and come out already
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize