You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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