Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
