A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize