I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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