he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
