His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
