And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
