So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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