She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Dignity is for republicans.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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