do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
