Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
