I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize