ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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