i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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