I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
