so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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