omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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