Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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