careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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