He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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