i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
